Sydney Spy Classic
Sydney Spy Classic
Wednesday, December 27, 2006

NYE Bridge Decoration Timeline

First of all... Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

Ever since 1998, all eyes have been on Sydney Harbour Bridge to supply us with bright shiny lights in the absence of hyper-vigilance midst a crystal meth high. So let's have a look back at what we've seen. Everyone already knows that this year we're having a giant coathanger to celebrate... the things which clothes hang on.



1998

The average Australian's reaction after ending the year that had Celine Dion, Aqua and Ricky Martin as #1 for about 3 months.

It was the first year, so we can forgive them for being a bit simple with a disembodied face indulging in its maschistic urges by showing elation with its head on fire.


Better suggestion: Pauline Hanson raising a wok

1999

"Etirunltv" scrawled and underlined on the bridge.

1999 is the official year of dyslexia, so there was nothing more appropriate than random letters spattered out in fluorescent tubing. There's some backstory about a homeless person and grafitti but I don't remember it. Something about him selling his soul to the devil for eternal life and he cursed him by burning this on his soul... something like that... plus vampires.


Better suggestion: The Hamster Dance!!!

2000

A Snake and a Star

Australia has lots of snakes.. and stars are pretty. ZERO other significance.


Better suggestion: Neopets wearing Kylie's gold hotpants.

2001

What The Bridge would look like if someone collapsed it to 1/20th of its size

One of Australia's favourite rocks finally got its fifteen seconds... or ~ fifteen days. It's nice but a bit boring.


Better suggestion: That guy who won the second Big Brother... the nice inoffensive one... no not him.. yeah the other one.

2002

"Peas" spelt wrong

After all the disputes about whether or not Australia should saw itself in half and form two seperate islands, this seemed appropriate.
We all know the result of the referendum and I hope my fellow members of East Caseydonoland can agree with me that this bird is a perfect mascot for our new country.
2003
"City of Lights"

The bridge was destroyed in the great fire of '03 after someone set those pillars alight on the short lived Raining Petrol Day. Instead, they just illuminated some buildings around Sydney for a while. It was pretty.

Better suggestion: A moving animation of Casey Donovan devouring Anthony Callea

2004

Torture Sphere

In celebration of success of the movie Saw, Australia couldn't help but catch the fever. This ball of giant sharpened metallic spinning fans hovered above the bridge (though many thought it was a mirror ball). It served as a way of disposing of useless reality show has-beens and solving the refugee problem. Since it was deemed "inhumane" by some PC board in 2005, we have since seen shows like Celebrities On Ice and Dancing With The Stars as a way of dealing with the issue of excess D-List celebrities... it has proved to be even more painful that the torture sphere.

2005

Giant Organs

Since Sydney is a 'living city', we showed a giant neon heart flashing in January. Afterwards came a massive vibrating appendix in February, an endless tube of intenstines which coiled around the harbour in March and so on in that order.

Better suggestion: Something celebrating my first year of university or something... gawwd! They're so selfish!

Either way, this year will PROBABLY be a green diamond and not a coat-hanger. Overall it's a nice addition that we have this in our city and we'll all feel REALLY old that we remember the first time they did it. The fact that they keep the sign up there for a few weeks in January lets you savour the feeling of a New Year for a bit longer. I just hope it's never supposed be a surprise.

What would YOU put on the bridge? Add a comment...



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